You know you’re in California if…

1. Your coworker has 8 body piercing’s and none are visible.

 2. You make over $300,000 and can’t afford a house.

 3. Your car insurance costs as much as your house payment.

 4. Your child’s 3rd-grade teacher has purple hair, a nose ring, and is named Flower.

 5. You can’t remember … is pot illegal?

 6. Gas costs $1.00 per gallon more than anywhere else in the U.S.

 7.  A really great parking space can totally move you to tears.

 8. You have a very strong opinion about where your coffee beans are grown,  and you can taste the difference between Sumatran and Ethiopian.

 9. You’ve been to a baby shower that has two mothers and a sperm donor.

 10. The guy at 8:30 AM at Starbucks wearing a baseball cap and sunglasses who looks just like George Clooney IS George Clooney.

 11. You take a bus and are shocked at two people carrying on a conversation – in English!

 12. You can’t remember … is pot illegal?

 13. You pass an elementary school playground and the children are all busy on their phones. (2008)

 15. Both you AND your dog have therapists.

 16. If you drive illegally, they take your driver’s license. If you’re here illegally, they want to give you one.

 17. The Terminator is your governor.

 18. HEY!!!! Is pot illegal????

Written by JIB Jones. ©2008.
@2008-2024 jibjones.net

President Andrew Jackson and “Indian Removal.”

Although the heat is on to remove the names and images of people on the “wrong side” of American history, and some could be erased, many are the people who built the country. Removing them would be like Christianity omitting the Devil from the Bible.

At some point in time the United States needs to come clean about its dark history. Teach it to everyone as a lesson. A rich and powerful country without faults based on beliefs does not make for a just world.

Contender #1

Andrew Jackson had a very cold 19th century heart. His dedication to removing indigenous tribes from “American” land so it could be given to “white settlers,” was epic. As a military commander he wrought destruction and death that eventually led him to his big moment as President in 1830; the Indian Removal act.

How can these brutal wounds ever heal when one of the main men behind it is still on the twenty dollar ($20) bill? Can’t we have good and bad apples?

In the south, the settlers were particularly eager to rid themselves of the “Five Civilized Tribes,” especially the state of Georgia, which was involved in a contentious jurisdictional dispute with the Cherokee Nation.

Technology Kills (Earth Day 2021)

Getting from Earth to Mars, yet alone flying around the red planet in a helicopter piloted from Earth, is a major accomplishment for humans. So is flying from London to New York, or driving from Wisconsin to Los Angeles, or producing 772 million metric tons of wheat and 60 million metric tons of beef in order to feed 7.5 billion people on a planet designed for just a few million. 

But, one thing about all of them is that none are good for the Earth, and all are most likely bad news for Mars and our Moon as well. More shit for the Universe from humans! 

Money that should be used for housing, feeding and educating people, is instead being used to create business opportunities for endless profits. It is a total disgrace.

If you want your grandchildren to live in a jar connected to the internet then just keep on going like we are!

If ever there was a need for an Earth movement it is NOW!

Laika – the first animal in space – it didn’t go too well.

©2021 jib jones jibjones.net

Definitions of Muse, No. 1

1702 – The Royal Dictionary English and French

MUSE, Subst. (a Goddess of Poetry) Muse, Deesse de la Poesie.

To be in a Muse (or in a melancholy Fit) 

to MUSE upon, verb. Mediter.

MUSICK, Subst. (the Art of fingering or playing on Instruments)

1770 – A New Complete English Dictionary

A MUSE, deep thought, close attention, absence of mind. 

To MUSE, to ponder, meditate, consider attentively, to wonder or be amazed. 

MUSE’UM, name which originally signified a part of the palace of Alexandria, which took up at least one-fourth of that city. This quarter was called the Muse from its being set apart for the muses and the study of the sciences. Hence the name is now given to any place set apart as a repository for things that have an immediate relation to the arts, &c.

MU’SES, nine imaginary heathen deities, viz. Clio, which means glory ; Euterpe, pleasing ; Thalia, flourishing ; Melpomene, attracting ; Terpsichore, rejoicing the heart ; Erato, the amiable ; Polyhymnia, a multitude of songs ; Urania, the heavenly ; and Calliope, sweetness of voice. 

To Clio, they attributed the invention of history ; to Melpomene, tragedy ; to Thalia, comedy ; to Euterpe, the use of the flute ; to Terpsichore, the harp ; to Erato, the lyre and lute ; to Calliope, heroic verse ; to Urania, astrology ; and to Polyhymnia, rhetoric.

MU’SIC, one of the seven liberal sciences, belonging to the Mathematics, which considers the number, time, and tune of sounds, in order to make delightful harmony ; the art of singing and playing on all sorts of musical instruments.

MU’SICAL, harmonious, melodious, sweet-sounding.

MU’SICIAN, one skilled in harmony ; a professor of music.

MU’SING, a pausing or thinking upon.

MUSQUETE’ER, a soldier armed with a musquet.

MU’SROL, the noseband of a horse’s bridle.

©2021 JIB Jones jibjones.net

Origins of Saint Valentine’s Day and Flower Giving

Although there continues to be disagreement about the origin of St. Valentines day, it was believed for many years that February 14 was the Saint’s birthday. As far as starting the trend of sending flowers, here is a story of old:

Charles, Duke of Orléans, one of the fondest lovers in all history, never paid a compliment to a lady without sending a basket of flowers to her with verses enclosed.

My lips I’ll softly lay,

Upon her heavenly cheek.

Dyed like the dawning day,

As polished ivory sleek.

And in her ear I’ll say,

“Oh, thou bright morning star.”

“Tis I that came so far,

My Valentine to seek.”

Charles was captured at the Battle of Agincourt in 1415, and sent to the Tower of London. He spent the next twenty years in English prisons, where he wrote poetry in English.

©2019 jibjones All Rights Reserved

Old Superstitions; Three on a Match

By 1900, it was already taboo to light a third cigarette with the same match. Where it started is not known, but it was reinforced by a sad story told in 1919 by The Times of Los Angeles’ Sports Editor and War correspondent, Harry A. Williams, concerning an incident with the 91st Division during World War I, at Argonne, France.

“Three privates, all of them slightly wounded, were limping back from the front one night, they sat down on the road to rest, and rolled cigarettes. Wounded men invariably crave a fag, even those who have never tasted tobacco before.

One struck a match, and with it lighted his own cigarette and that of one if his comrades. The third held out his cigarette for a light, but the man holding the blaze protested, as did his friend, that to ignite three from one match brings bad luck.

The other soldier was persistent, and kidded them about being superstitious, with the result that he was laughingly given a light from the same match. They had already taken two puffs when a shell hit in the center of the group, killing two of them outright, and wounding the other so seriously that he died on the way to the hospital. The incident became known when this wounded soldier related it to the stretcher bearer, and advised him never to attempt three lights from one match. This advice was unnecessary. It was not many days until the incident and the circumstances became known to practically every man in the division, and since then the Nintey-first (now 91st) Infantry Division has nurtured a perfectly good superstition.

There is no chance that the light from the match drew the shell, as the latter, coming from four of five miles, must have been fired before the match was struck. It was strictly a coincidence. If founded on facts, they wouldn’t be superstitions.” 

(Quoted from, NO THIRD LIGHT FOR SOLDIERS, by Harry A. Williams, Staff Correspondent of The Times of Los Angeles, February 16, 1919)


This page and all it’s contents are the property of JibJones.net
© J.I.B.Jones 2014-2018

YamaShiro, the Bernheimer Brothers in Hollywood

The Bernheimer Residence (Yamashiro) circa 1918

The Bernheimer house in Hollywood was built as the private residence of confirmed bachelors Adolph and Eugene Bernheimer of New York. The Bernheimer’s were Jewish, from Ulm, in Germany. The family arrived in the USA in the 1860s and 70s. Their grandfather, Adolph Bernheimer, who died in 1894, left $2.5 million, hundreds of acres of land in Manhattan, and the family fabric business.

By 1912, Eugene and Adolph were the leading  importers of Oriental goods in New York. The brothers made nineteen trips to China, Japan, Tibet, and the Philippines, where they visited pawnshops and purchased a wide variety of curiosities.

In Hollywood, they bought the historic hill next to the Outpost from H.J. Whitley, and started building their long-planned winter home to house their vast collection of Oriental art.

A January 1914 Los Angeles Times newspaper article titled, “Borrowed from the East,” said that the “Hollywood Hill Mansion” was “a Striking Object.” “Asiatic Even to the Teak in Its Walls.” And that the 16-room main building was “designed after the mansions of lordly Chinese mandarins.”

“Architecturally, the house is a modification only in the sense that its sanitary arrangements and household appointments are American and modern.”

“In every other line of construction and detail of finish it is entirely Chinese.”

By the start of World War 1, in July 1914, American’s of German descent had to show who’s side they were on, and with Japan declaring war against Germany in August, and China not taking sides, the full page description in November of the Bernheimer’s new home described everything on the property as Japanese, except for the Scottish carpets!

By the time construction of the “palatial home” was finished in November, 1914, the Times said the Bernheimer villa was not Chinese, but “a replica of all desirable in a Japanese dwelling place,” and it “Crowns Hollywood Hill Like Shogun’s Castle.”

During the year of construction it was dubbed, “Yama Shira,” by the public, after which the Bernheimer’s hung the cryptic name in Japanese letters on the front of the house.

The Japanese villa was full of carved furniture, and had a bedroom light that hung from the “lips of an inverted athlete swinging on a trapeze,” with the body in carved lacquer wearing a belt of jewelry that took a lifetime to make.

There were four large embroideries of famous Japanese wrestlers that hung in a stairwell, and in the tea room, a chest from a Shinto temple, along with a Japanese nobleman’s Sedan Chair.

Women were not allowed in the house, and it was never opened to the public by the brothers, except for two fundraising fetes that were held in the early 1920s for the Committee for Foreign Relief, benefiting the children of Poland and Serbia.

The Hollywood villa was the Bernheimer’s winter home, and not a public estate or garden.

Bernheimer Japanese Villa circa 1920

Without explanation, but likely over concerns for their privacy, and frequent hill fires, in the summer of 1924, the Bernheimer’s sold their Hollywood Japanese Gardens to real estate man Joe Toplitzky, and banker Marco Hellman. They then sold it to William Clark Crittendon of San Francisco and Los Angeles, in 1925, for $1 million. Crittendon spent another $1.5 million “fixing it up,” and leased it to Frank Elliot and his movie friends, who formed the Four Hundred Club, and made it their clubhouse.

Crittendon added a ballroom, a theater, a lawn, a tea garden, a riding club, a swimming pool, an out-door restaurant, and bungalows, to the twelve acre property.

At the opening party of the Four Hundred Club in October 1925, “the entire estate was thrown open to inspection, including the collection of Japanese art treasures in the various rooms.”

“Japanese girls in costume of the Flowery Kingdom served the guests while an orchestra, hidden in a wistaria, off the patio, rendered the music.”

Although very popular with the upper echelon of movie stars and film companies for a few years, the club folded in 1929, long before the stock market crash.

In 1933, and for the first time, the house was finally opened to the public, as a Japanese garden, when it was operated by the Hollywood Women’s Jewish Club. Many charity events were held at “Bernheimer Gardens” after that.

In 1944 the house and remaining contents were auctioned off. Many items were indeed oriental, but most were not part of the Berheimer’s collection, but were items purchased during the Crittendon remodeling in 1925, and the subsequent years as a public Japanese garden.

Eugene died at the Palace Hotel in San Francisco during Christmas 1924, after the brothers had sold their Hollywood Villa.

Adolph soon purchased new land in the Palisades from Alphonzo Bell, on the south east corner of today’s Sunset Boulevard and Pacific Coast Highway, where in 1926 he built the $1 million, and much larger, Bernheimer Estate and Oriental Gardens, which overlooked the ocean, and where he housed the best of the brother’s valuable Oriental art collection.

In March 1944, Adolph died at his home on Sunset Boulevard. On the day his death was announced, his home, and the second Berheimer Gardens, suffered a major landslide, blocking the Roosevelt highway (PCH), and eventually forcing the estate to vacate and abandon the land, which they did after a final auction was held in 1951.

©2008 jibjones All Rights Reserved